145. Bitter Tears

Note from The Storyteller:  If you have not read entries 1-144, do so.  There is much insight that will help you as you walk toward spiritual maturity.  All of the entries can be found at the following website:  https://www.waiting4thetrain.com/.  Also, please forward this email to everyone you think would be interested in and would benefit from reading this blog.


“Last night,” Stan began, “I re-read the story about Peter weeping after he denied knowing Jesus.  Are you familiar with that?”

“Somewhat,” was my reply.

“I’ve been thinking a lot about that lately,” Stan said.

“Any particular reason?” I asked.

“Well, mainly, because I have been focusing on how often I deny knowing Jesus.”

“Really?” I said.  “You surprise me with saying that.”

“Peter walked with Jesus for three years.  He had seen Him do amazing things with and for people out of His Love.  Peter had heard Jesus say some astonishing things.”

“Yeah, I know that.  But how does that relate to you?”

“After all Peter had experienced with Jesus, he denied even knowing Him when the going got tough.”

Continuing, Stan said, “Jesus was not surprised by what Peter did, but Peter sure was.  And when he realized it, he wept.”

“I still don’t see how that relates to you,” I said.

“You don’t know me as well as I do, but I want to be totally honest with you about how many times I deny knowing Jesus by my thoughts, words, and actions.”

“I may not come right out and say to someone that I don’t even know Jesus, but I know there are too many things about me that scream that I don’t even know Him.”

“What do you do when you realize those things?” I asked.

“I weep,” was Stan’s answer.  “I weep with the tears of confession and repentance.”

“They are bitter tears that are dried in the fabric of God’s forgiveness.”


Peter began to weep.  Mark 14:72

Prayer:  Lord, you know how often I deny knowing you by my thoughts, words, and actions.  You know and I know.  Please forgive me.  And please move in me to transform me into the person you intend, the one who will not deny you in any way, but will manifest you by being and by doing what you intend.  Thank you that I can and do bring these prayers before you in the name of Jesus.  Amen.

2 thoughts on “145. Bitter Tears”

  1. Hi Tim,

    Appreciate and enjoy these “posts” very much.

    RCE Richard C. Engel, MD President/CEO

    Anesthesia Consultants of California Medical Group, Inc



  2. This is an area that requires complete transparency and vulnerability with self and is required for a persons walls of ego to be razed.
    In our western culture especially, being a “self-made” person is revered and honored. Dependency on and Submitting to Jesus is mainly a foreign practice as perception is weakness of self.
    I’m reminded daily that “when I am weak, He is strong” My mindset must be that I live for eternity, not just here and now. Ive recognized in myself that I must recognize what is written in scripture is truth, that “I live in this world, but I am not of this world”. I must recognize that the god of this world is Satan as humanity (Adam & Eve) transferred and gave him the authority in the garden thru willing disobedience. All these concepts are foreign to humanities ways. I desperately need the power of the Holy Spirit to give me strength and courage to profess Jesus in and thru this gift of life I have been given.


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